In life, most of us are either / or
Either chocolate or vanilla. Either ketchup or mustard. Either butter or cream chesse. Either right-handed or left-handed. In life, there seem to be many choices and in most instances we are "either / or." The choice is most often not a manifestation of right or wrong, it's an expression of preference. What we lean toward, what we enjoy, what makes us most comfortable. Another of these situations is either Family or Friends. Do you tend to gravitate toward, socialize with and feel most at ease around a large group of family or an equally large group of friends?
Many years ago, at a time when I still hadn't yet found my kinship "either / or" I was introduced to the "family" side of the equation. A large, energetic, multi-course-eating, cross-talking, embracing and loving family (la famiglia). They took me in as one of their own; they taught me how to pace myself at traditional, seasonal family feasts; and they showed me the art of participating in one conversation, while listening to a second, and thinking about a third - when noticing a long lost cousin to reconnect with. And rather than petering-out or fading-back with age, the skill grew stronger, the stories more numerous and the desire to be heard/participate more assured. They taught me how to love family as friends (which concurrently fostered my ability to love friends as family).
So it was that this past weekend, I found myself in the vortex of such occasions; the venerable "Cousins Party." Now many may know this by a more common moniker - a family reunion, but something about a Cousins Party has a certain distinctive differentiated dynamic that sets it apart from the aforementioned family reunion. Not necessarily better - just different. And similarly, my preference for family vs. friends is not a purposeful or malicious favoring family and forsaking friends. Quite the opposite, most of my "friendships" are relationships where we think of and treat each other as family.
So, hey Canswerman, what's this got to do with cancer anyway (TCM: I thought you'd never ask). This particular Cousins Party gave me the chance to face many of the supporters, prayer-ers, and members of my Multiple Myeloma recovery team - and acknowledge my appreciation to them in person. Show my healthy glow, highlight my regrown hair, and prove my rebounded-ness in the flesh. I collected a lot of hugs, banked a lot of healing vibes, and was able to whisper a heart-felt "thank you" into the ears of a lot of loving family. Maybe one day I'll have a non-Cousins Party, invite all of my familial friends, and share my gratitude with them as well.
From 6-weeks to 106 years old - thank you, Merolas!
