I tend to be the kind of person who really doesn't have a lot of regrets about the decisions I've made in my life. Maybe that's because I'm so happy with how things have turned out. Maybe that's because I deny any of my bad decisions and block them out. Or maybe it's because I'm too addle-minded to even remember those decisions and just am living with what I've got. Regardless, I'm here now and have found little value in looking back and "regretting" (worrying or complaining about) all of the shoulda, coulda, woulda moments of my life. All of that said, I do confess that I have one regret about my cancer situation (keeping in mind that getting cancer wasn't technically a decision that I made, but one I am living with).
I know this sounds crazy, on so many levels - especially coming from a guy with a blood borne cancer, but more than anything I miss not being able to donate blood. Now don't go crowning me Gandhi 2nd, but it always felt like an easy thing I could do to help people - often in their greatest time of need (hey, I can build that donation back up inside of me in no time - technically 8 weeks - or at least I used to be able to). And the feeling of euphoria experienced from donating blood is nearly unparalleled (though shamefully less than 9% of the U.S. population knows this feeling - which is a personal crusade of mine; but that's a civic rant for another time). Not to mention the free Oreos and Cheez-its.
And the true irony of this whole thing is that the first indication that I had of MM brewing in my system was when I went to donate blood one time and was rejected for having a hemoglobin level below their minimum standards. They did alert me to this information - but understandably not that they thought I had cancer. Admittedly, I was too oblivious (ignorant?) to realize what that could possibly mean. But that which started with a blood donation could truly end with a blood donation. How cool is that: "It's the Circle of Life"
At some point in the future I may actually be able to donate blood again - pending a potential cure for MM and a lot of patience - but I look forward to that day with anxious anticipation, when finally once again I'll be able to "do it my way!" And did I mention that you get free Oreos for donating blood ?!?
PS: If you can, please think about donating. There are no data or evidence that coronavirus can be transmissible by blood transfusion, and there have been no reported cases worldwide of transmissions for any respiratory virus including COVID-19.
